And yet more work :)

Blowing Through The Wheat Fields

Into the wheat fields
They scatter and sow
Spindly stalks of fragile grain
Through the long summer will grow
Reaching up for the sky

Begging the sunlight to come
Needing to be fed
For without sunlight or nurturing
All living things are soon dead

Dead as the corpses
That lies in the graves
But for a moment in time to be had
Maybe someone could have saved

Yet the day and moment has passed
Time can not be undone
Nor can I make the sun rise
Or erase the memory of a wrong to someone

Life a life of regret
Of something that I had done or said
And at the side of the casket
I slowly raise my head

Cant bear the shame or pain
To look upon the one I have wronged
I was going to say Im sorry
But it seems I waited too long

Lord, I cry in my grief
Please forgive me, so sincerely
Please let them know how sorry I am
And how I really loved them dearly

That never really does relieve
The memory that haunts my mind
For every time I see a wheat field
I am transported back in time

I see myself standing by a casket
Tears streaming from my eyes
One day I hope I can finally
Let go and say goodbye



Only When

Funny, easygoing
Lovely personality
Happy go lucky they say
At least that is what they see

Beautiful face
With gorgeous green eyes
Blond hair
Curling down to the thighs

Smart and talented
With a heart of gold
They know not
Of the emptiness of her soul

Nor do they know
Of the loneliness or pain
Or the tears
That sometimes falls like rain

Staining the beauty of her cheeks
Burning holes upon her heart
Only when she is alone
Does she allow them to start

Only when she is lying
Alone at night
Finally to release the tensed muscles
And her hurt she starts to fight

Only when she is strong enough
Does she think about the past
And battles her demons
And the heartache that seems to last

Until the morning finally comes
Serenity the morning light bring
And only when she finds peace
There will be a harmony to things


Our Clouds

We lived our lives
Content in the friendship
The bond that held us
So very close
Summer afternoons
Lying in the grass
Down the slope
Of the little hill
Hiding we thought
From the world
The hurts we had endured
The pains and fears
We would watch the clouds
Bright white floating through the sky
Pretend it was a lion
Or maybe grandma
Or maybe angels
Our simple young minds
Wanting to believe
In those clouds
Wishing there was a power in them
That could change our lives
Then and there
Only later to discover
Those clouds did change our lives forever
They bonded us together
Brother and sister by spirit
Not only by blood
And they gave us hope
Hope for tomorrow
Simple power
Of our clouds
On a summers afternoon


Rain on a tin roof

Fast and thundering
Beating like a drum
Of the African desert
The rain poured down
The lightening tearing in the windows
Little girl huddled in the bed
All her fears come to life
With the sound of
Rain on a tin roof
Her sweet dreams interrupted
By the beat of the drum
Peace withholding until the rage
Of the storm passed by
Years go by
Rain still comes
Beating on a tin roof
But as her fears subsides
Or she manages to deal with
Her pain and demons of night
The thundering rhythm
No longer holds her from her sleep
Maybe for a moment
Even more years go by
Now only the most savage
Pounding of the drums
Wakes her and gives her heart a chill
Now the song
Of rain on a tin roof
Lulls her off to sleep
Peaceful and content
Not interfering with her sweet dreams


I Rock Myself To Sleep


I hold myself
In two arms
That feels so numb
And I weep

I put my arms
Around myself
And I rock
Myself to sleep

To be the best
To find myself
Everyday its the same
Battle to live





Aching Heart

The air shifted
Moved
Twisted
Along with my heart
An ache
A cramp
Reach out
Touch me
I want you
To touch me
But you
Cant stand me
It seems


Always Angry

You are
So angry
Always
Mad
Always
Off on some tangent
Of pisstivity
Some imagined
Or real
Wrong
That someone has done
Either deliberately
Or inadvertently
Doesnt matter
Gives you yet
Another reason
To stay mad
Stay sick
Stay miserable
Stay that way
Someday you will realize
That you chased all off
With your anger
And that you are alone
Because no one wants
To be miserable that long


Sovereign

Impoverished dignity
Mentally lacking humans
Discarded morality
Sovereigns of insanity
Wicked daydreaming
If life were to suddenly to combust
Rancid thoughts
Of power and glory
To be ultimate
To be the sovereign
But ultimately being
The sovereign
Of useless idle time
Wasted hours
A endless life
Of piggish sovereignty


Stale Dead Fish

Stale dead fish
I remember that smell
Will never remove it from
My haughty nose
Never again
I swore as a kid
Never will I have to smell
That smell again
The smell that represented
How my father made
The money that raised me
His skin radiated slimly fish
Fingers bleeding
From a fin
Jabbed into the tough
Hide of his hands
The hands of a working man
Trying to provide his family
With the means to do better
Than what he grew up with
To send them to private school
Costly it was
What did he live without?
Yet he made HIS dream
Come true
College student
I was
Educated
Yet stupid
To think that my dad
Had a lower job
He did the best he knew
To achieve the dreams he had


The Pecan Tree

To stand in a field
Looking out over the landscape
Loosing yourself in your surroundings
Focus on the single tree
That stands
In the middle of the field
Almost at the end
Lean against the gate
And wonder why
Why would anyone leave
A giant pecan tree
In the middle of a corn field
For over 30 years
For as long as you been alive
Yet no one in your family
Has mentioned the tree being there
Yet we all do not deny its existence
First it was my grandfathers tree
His favorite to pick up pecans under
Then my fathers
Every summer and fall to gather its fruit
I wonder if it will be mine someday
With its branches stretched to the sky
Giving a strange unmentioned comfort
To generations